Miss Priss

{Tuesday, March 27, 2007} Quick Update on K
First off, I'm sort of relieved to announce that K's head issues are NOT related to the head injury she received a while back. The bad news....

She has a tumor in the middle of her brain. The neurosurgeon said there is no way it was caused by her injury. However now we are in the process of trying to figure out what to do. They will NOT remove the tumor due to where it is sitting. It is touching her brain stem. We were told, at her last appointment, that if they tried to remove the tumor she has a 50-80% chance of being completely paralyzed on the left side of her body. And that's IF she were to wake up at all. So removal is NOT an option.

We go in first thing tomorrow morning to have a biopsy done so they can test it and see if they can figure out a plan of action. I'll find out tomorrow how long we have to wait for results. But as soon as I find out I'll be sure to post.

{Monday, March 19, 2007} Having Anger Issues
Now that K is sick, everyone keeps telling me how we need to go back to church and really pray for her. But I'm having issues. How can I go to church and worship a God who would allow a precious 5 yr old girl go through this? Why do I need to pray for something He should already know? I am so angry right now that my baby girl has to go through this. Why would He allowed a child to have an inoperable tumor? WHY?!?!?

{Saturday, March 10, 2007} UGH!!! I don't know what to do!
Okay so y'all know I ended up not taking K to the ER on Thursday. I've been keeping a close eye on her and things have been okay, I guess. She still complains of a headache but not bad like it was Wednesday & Thursday. Then today happens.

Suddenly K starts complaining that her head hurts. So I tell her to go lay down for a bit. She starts crying that it's hurting really bad. Then she complains that her stomach hurts. My mom tells her to go to the bathroom and see if she needs to go potty. She gets to the bathroom door and throws up all over. Man this girl has talent! She got it all over the floor, the wall and the bathroom door. So I decide I'm taking her to the ER. The doctor told me Monday that if she starts throwing up or acting like a different kid to take her in. So I finish cleaning up her puke when suddenly A poops his pants. So I have to clean him up. All the while K is laying on her bed crying. I finish cleaning A up and get K into the car. We pull out of our driveway and not even to the end of the road when she throws up all over herself and the back of the car. I debate on taking her home and cleaning her up or just heading straight to the hospital. I decide to clean her up. I know I would be totally uncomfortable being covered in throw up for a few hours. So I turn the car around and head home. We go inside and I get her in the bath. My mom takes over cleaning her up, so I head out to the car and start cleaning. I did the best I could for being in a rush.

I come back inside and my mom is getting K dressed. Suddenly she is her chipper self again. I ask her how she is feeling and she says she is feeling much better now. So here's my dilemma, do I still take her to the hospital? If I take her in like this they're gonna think I'm making things up. She doesn't look or act sick. UGH I just don't know what to do.

{Thursday, March 08, 2007} What do we know???

So I called the doctor yesterday and told her about K's head injury. She told me not to worry that more than likely it's not the cause of her tremors because it happened so long ago. So that makes me feel a bit better in the sense that my bad mothering skills weren't the cause of it. However, it makes me worry more because now we're back to square one and have NO CLUE what is going on.


Okay, well yesterday really. I picked up K from the daycare and she was complaining about a headache. As soon as we got home I gave her some medicine and she laid down. Next thing I know she is asleep. Okay, now today...

I got a call from the daycare around lunch time. K had been complaining about a headache all morning and now was getting worse. She was almost hysterical. They asked if it would be possible for me to go over there and give her some medicine. I was a bit worried that she was complaining about a headache again since it was so soon from the last one. And well, now I'm one of those over protective mothers. I called the doctor. I told her about the headaches and she tells me to get K to the emergency room immediately. Just lovely I'm thinking. I don't have the time to take off work today. I have time to take off, but I have to use all of it tomorrow for several appointments. Needless to say I ended up taking the time off. My baby girl is more important to me than a couple hours of pay.

I get home and my mom has K home already and she is sleeping. Mom gave her the medicine as soon as she picked her up and they walked home. So K was pretty tired. So I decided to let her take her nap, obviously she needed it cause she never sleeps. When she woke she seemed to be fine so I decided not to take her in yet. Since she has some appointments tomorrow and she's not acting funny and the headache is gone I decided to just watch her overnight and take her in tomorrow. Unless she gets worse of course.

Now I don't know if it was the best choice but so far everything seems okay. So that's it for now. I'm hoping I'll know more soon, but I really don't expect to get the results of the CT scan until we see the neurologist.

{Monday, March 05, 2007} I am such a great mom!!! (Can you hear the sarcasim)
I had to take K to the doctor today.

A couple of weeks ago her room lead at her daycare mentioned something to J. K seems to shake a LOT when she does stuff. We'd never noticed it, so J passed it off as her getting overly excited. Then a few days later I took K into daycare and the room lead talked to me about it. She seemed genuinely worried. So I started to keep an eye on her. Know what I found??? She really did shake. It was more like a tremor. (Think of someone with Parkinson's) So I started to watch her even more closely. She was shaking quite often. The room lead talked to J again and mentioned that she has been watching K and has noticed that the only time she is not shaking is when she is eating. That weekend K slept in my bed with me and I woke to the weirdest thing. She was shaking in her sleep!

So I called the doctor.

Today was her appointment. While watching the doctor do some simple tests I found out that this shaking was a LOT worse than I thought. She shakes her head, both arms (her left shakes worse than her right) and her left leg. And she shakes BAD. We now have a neurology appointment for further testing.

Oh why am I such a great mom? Yeah I feel bad that I wasn't the one who noticed this in the first place. Heck I don't even know how long this has been going on. The room teacher noticed it on her first day with K. So she has been watching her for a month now. Yeah she has been shaking at LEAST that long. But the kicker is this...

When I got home and dropped K off with my mom I told her about the appointment. The doctor asked if K happened to have some sort of head trauma happen to her. Nothing that I could think of. Of course I'm thinking recently. My mom pointed out the trauma from just over a year ago when she fell of the bed and cracked her head on the tile floor. Yeah remember those lovely posts about her bald spot? When she hit the floor so hard it killed the hair follicles and she went bald there? Yeah that trauma could possible be the cause of this. What's weird is that later in the day my mom took K to the park to play. While there another lady says to K "you must be freezing you're shaking so bad" and K responds "I'm not cold I just shake all the time." So my mom and this lady start talking. Apparently this lady, when she was little, was hit on the head with a rake. A few years later she developed something similar to Parkinson's. She went through 5 different medications to try to get it under control.

So I'm sitting here thinking... I wonder if this would be happening if I had taken K to the doctor for her goose egg and not waited until the bald spot happened. Maybe if I had been home all along and not gone to work, for selfish reasons, I would have noticed her shaking and not had to rely on someone else to see it. I know I can't change what had happened but I sure am playing the what ifs right now.

Location: Washington, United States

I'm 28. I'm married. I have 3 kids. I'm going crazy.

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